Empathy is caused by a hormone oxytocin. Created in the brain by the hypothalamus “As oxytocin is associated with trust, sexual arousal and relationship building, it’s sometimes referred to as the ‘love’ hormone’ or ‘cuddle chemical.’ Oxytocin levels also increase when you’re hugging someone and when you’re experiencing an orgasm.”
“A more promising way to boost oxytocin naturally is with exercise. One study noted a jump in oxytocin levels measured in participants’ saliva after high-intensity martial arts training. Music also seems to have the ability to increase oxytocin levels, especially when people sing in a group, which adds the element of bonding.”
My partner Edi, who had Huntington’s disease had no empathy as it progressed to destroy her brain functions. I sought counselling from the very conservative Huntington’s society for help with dealing with this and was told, “why, you don’t have the disease”. Many of the members had the unexpressed gene for the disease.
So the disappointments I’ve experienced were not my fault, I couldn’t create this lack of oxytocin in others and I can’t fix it. I can’t control the chemicals in another’s brain. Edi became worse at faking empathy over time. The love bombing and sex bombing were to exploit vulnerabilities in me, I was seeking healthy ways to fill needs for communication, companionship and sex. She called me ‘needy’ as I began to ask for what I wanted, when she withdrew after I was firmly on the hook, financially dependent after having moved in together in a place only 2 of us could afford, and my income was limited as I was accepted into school on student loans.
They hate us for our empathy, it makes them look bad.